I will not be just a tourist in the world of images, just watching images passing by which I cannot live in, make love to, possess as permanent sources of joy and ecstasy~ anais nin
I walked complacent in the sun. Shrugged off his words and the heat and moved languidly toward the road. There was an ache that was palpable it was was shouldered with desire for recognition of the soul. There is no comfort in the loneliness of the underserving. I looked to the the ocean it was flat and calm, no one was out just a swimmer and few boats anchored in the bay. I dove down as deep as I could to the bottom. In those moments of holding my breath and the minor heartache, I let the current carry me. And in that dividing of time and space I realized I was no longer going to choose. That I would let the Universe choose for me. That I was no longer going to fight which way the current took me but that I would just surrender. I took in the sunlight only hearing the sound of my breath. In that moment I felt close to god somehow, some sort of strange rebirth taking place through all these minor disappointments of almost romances. Stories repeating themselves with different characters. I realized I was ready to give up the stories. I remembered with great ease all the beautiful moments of love this island had given me. There were grand heartaches but also true moments of joy. I couldn't say anyhow where I was going to end up or with whom. But in that moment I truly surrendered. I surrendered and kept on swimming and my heart was full and ready.